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1st World Dog Problems


Salukifan
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I know i have been an awful, selfish, uncaring mum , when i have to get up and leave for work at 5am and he has to be woken up and put outside.

Just dreadful that his sleep has been disrupted, he has to go out to 3 options of trampoline beds with cushions and sheets, numerous kongs and treat containers and treats hidden around the yard. I know i couldnt put up with such attrosities!!!!!

Edited by Bullmastiffmum
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When there are more than 3 tennis balls around the one that was thrown and you can't decide which one you want the most. Then when you attempt to carry them all you get one stuck in your throat and mum has to pull it out.

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When you get bathed against your will and it ruins your accumulated smell of grass, marsupial poo and whatever that thing was that you rolled in on the front lawn :mad

Or the fact that you have three trampoline beds, three canvas kennels, three crates, one blanket bed and one jumbo cushion bed to sleep on but the horrible humans get annoyed because they didn't bother to put something in the middle of the back lawn for you so you had to drag freshly laundered bedding out and dig/kick it into a grotty pile before you can have a decent nap (you do have a trampoline bed less than two metres away but that's beside the point).

Or the crate mat (the new crate mat) that you so carefully tore into billions of tiny pieces of foam finally got cleaned up. So now you have to play with plain old dog toys.

Having to eat fresh steak for dinner that hasn't been cut into bite sized pieces- as if you're some kind of animal.

Poor, poor hounds :(

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When the cat eats ALL her food, instead of leaving a teaspoon of it for you to lick out of the bowl. Cats are selfish!

Oh, Diva. That is awful, depriving you of the pleasure of bowl licking. Naughty cat :scold::scold:

when your human closes the glass sliding door but not the flywire door and you run straight into it thinking it is an open doorway.

Oh no. This made me cry. I had to be careful about this for Mufti the Magnificent ( :rainbowbridge: ). I went away for a couple of weeks and on the list of instructions I left the house sitter was to make sure of this very thing :cry::cry:
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Guest Labradork

I have one and it happened just now...

When your 7 month old Lab is big enough to take a 500g block of cheese from the kitchen bench.

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Guest Labradork

And one that happened in the past...

When your (fully grown) Lab eats an enormous fruit and cheese platter, five minutes before your guests arrive.

And manages to pick all the grapes off the vine, too!

Edited by Labradork
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When you go to the vet and they give you drops to put on your dogs vulva because they are out of the cream, and when you point out the laws of gravity are going to be working against you in this venture, they don't offer any helpful suggestions!

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When your humans clean the glass sliding door for the first time in ages and you see a possum on the other side and knock yourself out assuming the door was open

When your humans take you walking on a golf course and you try to run across the lily pads over the pond assuming they are grass.....then when your humans are too paralyzed with laughter to come help you out of the water

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When your Kong rolled under the lounge chair.

When your human won't let you eat that piece of bread with tomato sauce that's on the ground but offers you some meat instead. (*pout* "But I want bread.")

You can't decide what order to eat your chicken wings in and have to lay them all out next to each other on the ground to choose.

Your chicken has half-formed eggs in its body cavity. Ewww, gross. There are goobers in my food.

A pet rabbit is on your bed.

A hairy spider is floating in your water bowl.

A bird found the bone you were taking a break from for a moment, took it into the nearest tree, and then accidentally dropped it into the next door neighbour's yard.

Another dog in a yard says a rude word to you as you're walking past.

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