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I Need To Vent - Still Shaking


suziwong66
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Every Saturday morning we take 3.5 year old labby Wilbur out for puppycino at our local cafe; i ALWAYS hem him in with me being the block to the sidewalk. The cafe has tables butted up against the building front, then there's the walk way, then they have more tables at the roadside.

Over the past 6 weeks we've also started taking our newest fur family member in a puppy stroller. She is always on the path side. She's currently 14 weeks old.

Today a bloke with a big GSP stopped right in front of the stroller facing us. he had his dog in a collar hold. Immediately my dogs reacted; they became aware of the dog but were calm. I grabbed wilbur's collar so he wouldn't pull toward the dog and Laiken stood up in the pram and became focussed on the dog. i asked him to please move away. he didn't and then started talking to me. i started to tell him that i didn't want him coming close to us and then Laiken started barking; just what i didn't want. he then started to tell me that his dog was friendly rah rah rah and i told him this is exactly what i didn't want and that he didn't have the right to force a meet and greet upon us. i grabbed wilbur and took him over the curb away from people to remove us from the turbulence and lost my temper and when i walked away i swore (which i regret). OH was following with Laiken. Then the fellow came over to us again!! And i told him again that he didn't have the right to force a meeting and i was trying to avoid getting the puppy jacked up. He said i was rude; and i returned with you're rude and that you don't have the right to force a meet and greet with my dogs and your dog just because you want to. You don't have the right to socialise my puppy; that's my right. I asked you to move and you wouldn't. It was a really confronting situation for me, he hemmed us in so getting away from him was difficult. He then tried to tell me if i take my dogs out in public then i have to expect meetings and i said no i don't. Going out in public with my dogs does not exclude me from the right to be left in peace; i didn't bother him and he has no right to force me into a meet and greet.

Then the young guy from the clothing store next to the cafe came out for his two cents worth; he doesn't like me because when Wilbur was a puppy and i was training and walking past his shop to the cafe one day, he was sitting on the set outside and reached out and patted Wilbur without asking. i asked him not to because the dog was training and i didn't want him losing focus. He told me today "it's just a dog"...i just told him it's my right to raise my dog the way i want without other people forcing situations on me without any choice.

I've never come across someone who totally ignored my request to move away; he forced us into a meeting and more importantly hemmed us physically in. I'm so fecking angry. Nobody has the right to force me to socialise my pup with their dog. Nobody has the right to force me to have a meet and greet in a public space with other people sitting around enjoying their weekend. A crowded cafe, imo, is NOT the place for a doggy meet and greet.

I really regret swearing...i panicked because this guy hemmed us in and Laiken started reacting to his dog...which was what i was trying to avoid. I still want to slap the clothing store owner laugh.gif

rant over.

Edited by suziwong66
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That sounds really frustrating and stressful. Hopefully there'll be no lasting effects for Laiken. Unfortunately I think most people you met won't have any appreciation for what you're trying to achieve and when you want them to just stop you don't exactly have time to explain your reasoning. :(

That's my biggest nightmare when I start getting my puppy out too because she's so little every dog is probably going to look big and frightening let alone if they get in her face.

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Absolutely agree ,I would have been furious .Non- dog people have no idea (mostly) of how important that early training and socialisation is.Not to mention you trying to relax! Those people often come in with "oh,my dogs fine with other dogs" totally ignoring your feelings.You are perfectly deserving of a big Rant ....

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Why are people so dumb?

I went for a walk in the local oval the other morning with my 3 foster dogs (small) on lead. There was a woman at the tap outside the oval and I could just see a small dog which didn't appear to be on lead - I hurried into the park and closed the gate behind me. I started walking and didn't look back - suddenly my dogs were yanking back on the lead and I turned around to see what the issue was - to my amazement, what appeared to be 2 very young Pug crosses were near my dogs.

Stupid woman was standing behind the gate just watching. I said " I hurried in to avoid you", she just shrugged.

They were dear little dogs and approached mine, one of which isn't great on the lead but I waited and then they got a bit scared and ran off back to their owner.

Luckily I didn't have a dog that tried to take their heads off .....

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the irony of the situation is that about 10 or so minutes before, Wilbur turned and approached the lady sitting behind us (really confined back to back seating) through the arm of her chair. i was tending to Laiken at the time (i clicker train while i'm out with her) and i missed him. as soon as i saw him turned around, i pulled him back, but it was not in time for her to get a fright. she was very very frightened and i immediately apologised. I don't let my dogs interact with anyone when we're out. It was totally my responsibility to keep him from approaching people and i failed and i apologised to her with no excuses.

It's really difficult to train dogs to ignore people when every other day someone approaches without permission and encourages my dogs to break from the sit or drop beside me. i can't win frown.gif Two weeks ago a guy from the next table leaned across and actually called to Wilbur icon_smile_mad.gif and i had to keep my cool and stop him.

My poor dogs get so many mixed messages frown.gif despite how hard i try to keep people away.

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I think you need to relax and chill, we cant be responsible for other peoples behaviour, only how we react to it.

I stopped taking my dogs to the kids soccer years ago, as parents would let their kids charge over and annoy my dogs and I spent more time watching that than my daughter playing soccer.

The final straw was a child of about 3 who before I realised had my BT in a head lock face to face one morning while the parents just looked on and laughed.

you have to accept not everyone is dog savvy, and you can come over as crazy dog owner if you are not careful, softly softly works much better.

The other thing is ,don't get so stressed around your dogs, they will pick up on it.

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I think you need to relax and chill, we cant be responsible for other peoples behaviour, only how we react to it.

I stopped taking my dogs to the kids soccer years ago, as parents would let their kids charge over and annoy my dogs and I spent more time watching that than my daughter playing soccer.

The final straw was a child of about 3 who before I realised had my BT in a head lock face to face one morning while the parents just looked on and laughed.

you have to accept not everyone is dog savvy, and you can come over as crazy dog owner if you are not careful, softly softly works much better.

The other thing is ,don't get so stressed around your dogs, they will pick up on it.

Yep!

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Sorry, but i don't intend to follow suit and not take my dogs out in public places that we enjoy frequenting together. I am however going to pick other eating locations that have physical environments that are better suited to keeping passers-by from encroaching on our personal space.

Additionally the puppy will wear a high viz vest indicating she's in training.

I am normally never stressed around the dogs, even when people approach us. But on this occasion we were hemmed in and then followed by this man and his dog who wouldn't take "no" for an answer. I reacted fine in the initial stage: I asked him to move away twice and he wouldn't move away. I knew that the puppy was going to react; he came too close and confined us in to the wall. I reacted in what i see as the only possible solution; to move away to reduce the puppy's reaction; because he wouldn't...even then he followed us.

The way i see it, he was harassing us.

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I hate the idea that we should just "get over it". HELL NO. Who has to live with that dog for the next 10+ years? That would be me not you. I made a similar thread to this when Roscoe was a puppy, and I came across a number of similar situations where people tried to force themselves or their dogs on my puppy. I didn't back down and even though that got me a lot of filthy looks and a number of "get over it" comment, I now have an amazing dog who is exactly what I wanted.

Your dog is YOUR dog, you have every right to dictate every single greeting that they go through.

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