Staffygirl88

No, its not abuse. Calling people pathetic nasty ignorant low lifes that need to grow up and telling them to f#ck off is abuse. People telling you to return you pup is advice you don't want to hear. You've concluded that people think you're a bad person when all some think is that this is not a good time for you to be trying to manage a sick Dad and a baby pup. Ignore that if you wish but responding by labelling people who are actively trying to help you in such insulting terms is self destructive behaviour. For one they'll stop trying (and you clearly need help) and for another if they tire of it you'll get reported and booted off the forum. When someone says 'return the pup' to me that's giving up before I've even had a decent go with her. Being told that I have no idea about dogs or whatever was said is insulting. I came here for advice and got crap like that, so I'm sorry if I've offended you but I've been offended myself.

People are and have been flamed for way less then some of the stuff that has come out of this persons mouth. Sorry I am upset but what does a person expect coming onto a website of dog LOVERS and saying some of this stuff? Of course people think the worse and react accordingly. Saying some of what!? I haven't said anything bad about the dog itself! So how have I offended any of you? Yes some of the things she has done recently have been frustrating but that does not mean I am taking it out on her!

REALLY. the op is lucky she wasnt reported for a post that was offensive. So much for being 'another one for my ignore list' ;)

And this is not the first time. When you're making your judgements of those responding Staffygirl, consider for a moment that you don't appear to have been reported for that charming post that it is very clear breach of forum rules. My guess is that most of us are feeling some empathy for your situation and concern for the welfare of your pup. Rather than see you booted off, I'd say most would like you to stay and get some help. No one has sworn at you or abused you. You cannot say the same. If you cannot control your temper sufficiently to post in accordance with the rules, log off, take a break and go pat your pup. She's the one most of us are trying to help. I have been abused thanks. Telling me to return my pup because I can't care for her is imo abusive. I don't care if I'm reported, there's no point asking for help when most of what I get isn't helpful at all, it's just people being nasty. I can take constructive criticism and use it, when people are just abusing me or being nasty it's infruriating.

Thank you. I want to stick it out and I also hate the puppy phase but easier to train them from babies imo. ;)

I do NOT feel resentment towards my pup. It is a shitty time to get a pup, but no time will ever be perfect I found that out when I got pregnant. Life happens and you have to deal. I'm venting on here as opposed to venting at my pup what's so bad about that? She's outside today and from what I can see she's loving it! Playing in the sun eating the grass and weeds (it's a first rain free day since she got here) And I do have bad days, everyone does. It doesn't mean I should send my pup back or that I'm a horrible person

Yes, we're all so pathetic, nasty, cold-hearted and ignorant that we took the time to put forward our opinions and/or advice when YOU came here asking for it. You've been given advice, use it to your advantage ;) Advice and bitching are very different. Telling me to give my pup back to the breeder is not advice that's just cruel.

No, sadly I think there is a puppy who has been chucked out in a back yard somewhere and is being let down by it's owner. This is her first day in the yard FFS!

The only reason I didn't leave her outside when I went to the doctor was because there's been a few pup thefts in the area lately. And she hasn't been microchipped yet, she will be when she has her next vaccination

Maybe you lot should stop being nasty. Say what you like, I have a happy kid, and hope to have a happy dog when she's an adult. She is outside today, it is a beautiful day and she has cried TWICE since being outside. And poodlefan, yes she's being fed. All I can say to you guys is PATHETIC NASTY COLD-HEARTED and IGNORANT I am ranting on here I am not yelling at my pup or abusing her thanks and I don't ever intend to. And yes I do get angry, and I'm not perfect and from what you all have said NONE of you are. Low life people who just pick at people when they're down. I'm not going to take crap from people I don't know it's just pathetic. GROW UP You lot must think you know everything and are just so darn perfect when it comes to raising dogs. If you've got nothing nice to say then F--K OFF

Yes I agree. I found this a bit disturbing. It wasn't the puppy's fault. If I came home and found my pup in that state I'd be furious AT MYSELF for putting the poor thing through such a horrific experience. They HATE pooing where they sleep and she would have been exceptionally distressed by the time you let her out. I sure hope you were nice to her and reassured her etc. I only left her because I couldn't take her to the doctors. And I bathed her, how's that for cruelty!

How much more advice would you like?! People have read your posts, assessed the situation and advised as best they could...even if they felt that the pupyp would be best returned to it's breeder. If you want to keep the puppy then take the advice you've been given and start treating her kindly, assist her in toilet training stop using poor methods of domination that will only serve her poorly. I'm pleased to read you will try more appropriate methods regarding food and your son ;) I asked for advice not bitching. They're very different things. You can't tell someone to return a pup when you don't know the whole situation. Like I said, none of you know me personally. As for 'start treating her kindly' well up yours basically. She is outside today because I know that I am not in a state to deal with her right now and as bad as that is that's life, shit happens. If I need a day to deal with it I'll have that day.

Thanks for the advice and I will take what I've read here on board but it is much easier to listen to 'constructive criticism' than nastiness and bitching. I do think I have to start again because we were doing great until dad was diagnosed then I kinda fell to pieces and so did my pup.

Thanks atleast someone doesn't think I'm a complete moron. I joined this forum for advice and a place to whinge but obviously if I whinge I can't handle the pup and should send it back asap. It's not my first pup but as I said it's been a really bad time and she's most likely picked up on that, hence the accidents and so forth. I will try other methods with her food and my son (who is chewing on his shirt atm)

Let's get this bit correct, there is no such thing as a " British Staffie". The Amstaff and the Staffordshire Bull Terrier are not one in the same in terms of type or temperament and you have no clue about either breed and what they require. Well explain to me how they are different considering I'm so uneducated (in your opinion) You're being quite rude saying I have 'no idea' about either breed. When I say British, I mean the smaller Staffordshire Terrier and yes they did originate in BRITAIN hence being BRITISH

If you've previously had 4 dogs then you'd be well aware that a baby puppy isn't going to be Super Fido, you can't expect an 8 week old to be full house trained and behave like a well adjusted/trained adult dog. Sure, the breeder shouldn't have implied all these things but common sense should have told you that this just wasn't going to be the case?! It's not too late, return the puppy ;) Yes I am well aware of it and I am entitled to have a whinge when I was mislead! Don't tell me to return a pup that I waited 6 months for and saved for why don't you get off your high horse and not tell other people what to do all you know is what I've wrote on here you don't know ME you don't live with ME so don't tell me what to do

A couple of things - an 8 week puppy will not be 100% housetrained when you collect it. A breeder advertising that is not being truthful. A dog will not look you in the eye, esp when you are being angry and intimidating (in its view) - avoiding eye contact is one way in the puppy world to avoid confrontations and to show it is submissive. I assume you have bought a staffy pup, if you are after something placid and calm you should probably not have gotten a pup and maybe gone with an older dog. What breed research did you do? Did you research your breeders? (btw - Is your breeder a registered breeder with the canine association?) Sorry, but your post has actually pushed my buttons, becuase it has been with unrealistic expectations that you have bought a puppy, and unless you start educating yourself and stop blaming the puppy for its 'faults' then its going to end badly for all concerned - probably with a trip to the pound. And if you want to know what trouble and expense that causes, go check out the rescue thread. That was my whinge. I am pissed at the breeder for letting me have high expectations and for not worming the pup. It is an Amstaff pup, and I have had 4 British Staffies so I'm familiar with the breed. I did want to get an older dog because the puppy stage is just like having a newborwn baby. But I wanted the puppy to grow up in the presence of my son and be used to him. And yeah the breeder is a registered breeder And don't assume I'm uneducated, if you bothered to read the entire thread you'd see it was a shitty time to get a dog at all, but I didn't know that until I had her. If I had, I would NOT have gotten the dog at all.

i saw a childs face after it had been ripped off when a dog had a bone and the child went to take it. i NEVER want to see that again. the child was 2 years old and known to the dog. dogs, children and food DO NOT MIX. That is what I'm trying to prevent! I don't want my pup to be food aggressive at all to anyone! Which is why I take her food and give it back and put my hand in her bowl so that she doesn't snap at me when she's older.

i never put my hand in my dogs food nor do i take it away from her but i can assure you that if she has anything in her mouth that i want she drops it immediately. she will also refuse food until i give her an ok. imo if a dog is hungry it makes them anxious if the food is removed and i bekieve it is cruel. my dog does not get fed until she has looked at me and i give a release word. in this way she understands i control the food and she controls when she gets it, ie the quicker she is calm the sooner she eats. I don't take her food away until she's almost finished her meal. I don't take it the second she gets it she's almost eaten all of it by the time I take it, then give it back.

Oh dear. Why is this such a big problem for everyone? I'm there when she's being fed. If she sees him as a pack leader she won't snap at him when he goes near her food. Even if he's just walking past. And as I control the food I can take it away and give it back, if everyone did this with pups there wouldn't be food aggression because the dog would know they're going to get it back, but when their owner is ready to give it back.

I definitely understand about the bad timing issue. As some people here know, I’ve run into that recently myself. My father’s got stage 4 terminal cancer i.e. he’s dying. We’re usually not his primary care givers (we provide backup) but because of this and that, for the last few weeks my brother and I have been taking turns “dad-sitting”. Last week, my husband’s grandmother died so he flew back to Canada for 2 weeks and work got busy all of a sudden so I’ve spent a lot of time driving around like a maniac and my poor puppy was left alone for 12 hours on the day my husband left for Canada. There was just nothing else that could be done. Fortunately since then, he’s only been left alone for maybe 8 hours during the day but still .. It’s not easy to ‘hide’ your emotions from your dog - I’ve had two good cries in the last couple of weeks and Elbie sits there looking bewildered and then he tries to lick my face. Point is - most problems are ok if they come in ones but when they come in twos, threes and fours ... that's when they get a bit overwhelming. Hang in there. There are plenty of people who sympathise and understand that just because you express frustration and distress about your dog doesn’t mean that you don’t want a dog and that you didn’t know what you were getting into. Don't get onto online arguments - it's just not worth it and it's the last thing you need right now when you have so many other demands on your emotions. You're here to get help not debate or defend yourself. As my husband and I have discussed, the reality of owning a puppy can be quite different to one's imaginings. We thought that we were very prepared but seriously, there were times when we thought: "How on earth does such a little thing create so much poop?????" and "You just wee'd - how on earth did you do it again????" I feel quite a bit of regret that during Elbie’s early puppy days we were so busy reacting, following, cleaning up, correcting etc that we probably didn’t ‘enjoy’ his snubby nosed puppy awkwardness as much as we would have liked so I hope you can find a few quiet moments to enjoy as well as react. ;)

And if at any stage in this process, something goes wrong, your son will be needing the services of a good microsurgeon IF HE'S LUCKY Your son is a child. He isn't the pack leader of anything and won't be for years. You are. Your job is to keep your son safe and to supervise at all times and separate otherwise. I'd tried to be polite but I'll be blunt now. You are endangering your son by encouraging him to handle your dog's food. STOP IT. If you don't want to take my word for it, go read the dog attack statistics. The most frequent targets are boys aged under 4, they are bitten on the face and head and food is a very frequent feature of attacks. Your dog should be able to eat her meals without interference and to have a nice bone in the backyard in peace. For pity's sake, forget all the crap about dominance and pack leadership and keep your child AND your dog safe. If you want to do something like this, teach puppy to sit and drop and then teach your son the cures. He can reward for obedience but only undersupervision. I understand your objections to my teachings and that's your opinion which you are entitled to. This is how I was taught and brought up with my dogs when I was a child. If my dog doesn't see my son as a pack leader then he will dominate my son and hurt him. I'm trying to teach the puppy to move away from the food when myself or my son approaches. Also I never let my son out of my sight when the pup is near him or can be near him. I practised this with my last staffy and he was brilliant with food, if I came near him he would step back from his bowl, sit and make eye contact with me and would not eat again until I let him. My dog needs to have RESPECT for my son and she will. No matter what his age, he is her pack leader.

Please stop this practice. Feed her in her crate. Children should be taught to leave a dog alone when it is feeding. They don't particularise this behaviour and you'll be teaching your son that he can do this with any dog, any bowl and with your dog with any food. This is an unsafe lesson to learn. Teach your son to leave your dog alone at feeding time. The best way to 'drain a puppy's energy' is games and training. She's too young to be walked any distance for some months yet. Is there a trainer or a dog training club you can get to. You need this dog effectively leash trained before she gets too big. My son doesn't approach any other dog, he is too timid (thankfully) and I don't encourage him too either. He's old enough to understand that our dog is OUR dog, don't touch or go near other dogs and he's been really good about it. My sister has a Staffy next door and he doesn't go anywhere near her unless I do. And I want my pup to learn that my son is her pack leader also and that if he goes near her food she is to surrender it to him. There are so many different opinions on walking ;) I love walking and I'd love to take my pup for a walk, even if it's just ten minutes. I am enrolling her in puppy class at my Vet's, that starts at the end of this month. I do agree that she needs to be leash trained ASAP

Take your dog back to your breeder, or find someone who will give it a loving home. Then buy yourself a stuffed toy. It doesn't chew, crap or bark. That is what you are obviously after. My frustration doesn't mean I don't want her. Coming to that conclusion is a bit nasty imho and if you can't say anything constructive to me then say NOTHING. Go be nasty somewhere else thanks

She is not 'toilet trained' on paper, she is paper trained. So she probably has no idea where you want her to go outside, so you need to teach her. Giving her a handful of food when she is hysterical is essentially rewarding her for being silly. It will be giving her very mixed signals and probably why she gets even more worked up because she thinks you will cave in and feed her every time she plays up. Even if you have to put her on a lead beside you and just give a gentle tug of correction every time she goes for the food before you tell her to. From day one, we made our boy sit and wait for his food. Now I can walk out of the room and know that he will not eat until given the command. He will drop, shake, come, sit and stay whenever I ask even when there is food because he KNOWS he'll get it when he's good. Perhaps you can even consider using her meals to train her in the basics, like sit, drop, stay and come? Then you will be channeling her food focus into something else and it could calm her down. I know it's rewarding her bad behaviour ;) It happens in the morning before mealtime, she gets so worked up and cries and howls it's as though she's starving so I gave her a little bit of dog food when she sat, although she wasn't calm. But I didn't feed her until she calmed down after that, I also practice taking her food from her and putting my hand in her bowl when she's eating, my son does the same and is proud of himself for doing it lol He used to be petrified of all dogs, until he met a Bull Mastiff I have no idea why but he liked the 'big dog' and wouldn't touch any other dog. :D I have to be firm with her and consistent, it's getting into a routine that's hard as it was screwed up a fair bit lol I'm hoping she'll be fine once she's leash trained, then I can walk her morning and night and drain her energy Any tips on leash training? Topaz just grabs the leash and chews and plays with it or tries to bolt