Qu. Re Who Dogs Bond With...

[Red Ruby]

My hubby has always been the doggy person, our dogs have always bonded with him. They like me but will ignore me completely when he appears. But not Ruby!! She will ignore him completely when she sees me 100% of the time. It is really frustrating him because he isn't used to it at all...I LOVE it!!!

She will sit at my feet, tail wagging, staring at me pleading for a pat even if he is laying on the floor calling her name right near me. If we both sit on the floor she will come straight over to me and lick me or lay next to me.

Edited March 28, 2010 by Red Ruby

[Teebs]

I live alone, so no one to fight with, BUT, Atlas adores my Dad, At and I lived at mum and dads for about 4 weeks when I first got At, then moved out, but when Dad is here i get totally ignored, Atlas sits and watches dad all the time and wont do anything I tell him to do

[MrsD]

Erny, in our case it's more than just who the dog will obey/see's as pack leader. If I ask Ebony to jump, she wants to know how high, half the time if Eddie asks her to do something she just ignores him but she undoubtedly "loves" (to put a human emotion on a dog) him the most.

But what is it that tells you she loves Eddie the most?

I'm playing a bit of devil's advocate here because I don't know you or your dogs to actually see. But I do have a view (and note that I am generalising only and that there are exceptions to the 'rule' - perhaps you are one of them too). And that view is that if the dog perceives itself to be higher in hierarchy (I'm not necessarily talking extremes, potentially just degrees) that dog might also perceive itself as having the role of protector. To protect, they need to be around and have access to 'their' pack. Is the greeting relief by the dog that you're back (because s/he wasn't able to do the job s/he feels is his/hers to do)?

This post is not directed to you specifically or solely MrsD. It is for anyone who reads to consider and toy with, as an idea. I just don't want you to think that I'm backing you in to a corner. I'm just exploring with your minds, to see if anyone can recognise in their own dogs whether they've been seeing things the reverse way around from what their dog's potentially seeing.

OK, I'm going to try to answer 2 points

But what is it that tells you she loves Eddie the most?

If we both walked downstairs together, she would go to him - everytime. If we both called her, she would go to him - everytime. If I'm holding her & he walks over she will pull away from me to get to him (if I let her). The "signs" that she "loves" him are so much stronger for him ie if I walk out & pat her, she wags her tail, if he walks out & pats her she goes crazy. Ummm, Im not even sure if what I'm saying makes sense . She clearly wants to be with him far more than she ever wants to be with me.

And that view is that if the dog perceives itself to be higher in hierarchy (I'm not necessarily talking extremes, potentially just degrees) that dog might also perceive itself as having the role of protector. To protect, they need to be around and have access to 'their' pack.

Im not quite sure what you are trying to say here, but with regard to pack heirachy, I have often mentioned to Eddie that I think when it comes to him, Ebony feels she has the role of his "protector". If he walks downstairs & the other dogs come over to him or race around, Ebony will run after them & "tell them off" & she has started to have a go at Whisper (bottom of the pack, Ebony is next dog up) & pin her to the ground. If I walk outside by myself, or with him, Ebony will ignore the other dogs & will come straight over & greet us in a subservient (sp?) fashion.

Does that answer any of your questions? (clear as mud? ;) )

ETA - Jarrah is a completely different kettle of fish, Eddie & I were just talking about it & with him it's more a loyalty. It doesn't mater where I am in the house, when he's outside Jarrah can be found outside that room. If I drive off up the driveway, Jarrah will sit on the front steps watching like a hawk until I come back. He never takes his eyes off me, he is just completely obsessed with me. He completely ignores other people, he's not interested in other people, only me.

Eddie's comment was that if Jarrah were a person, he'd be a stalker .

Edited March 28, 2010 by MrsD

[fainty_girl]

Jessie (stumpy tail cattle dog X) bonded with my mum and has been her shadow ever since we rescued her. We went to Canberra to pick her up and on the car-ride home, Jessie was annoying me by standing on my lap in the car (she is a solidly built dogn and was full-grown) so I swapped seats with my mum. Big mistake ...Jessie was meant to be "my" dog, but she chose my mum that day.

With Tilly (kelpie X) fortunately my mum didn't come in the car that time , and I was the first one to take Tilly for walks and have always fed her etc, so she had always had a bond with me. Tilly isn't a one person dog like Jessie though and she will bond with anyone who pats, plays or feeds her.

Edited March 28, 2010 by fainty_girl

[Gayle.]

What do you all think when you talk of "bonding"? Do you mean the dog prefers to hang around near you more, or are you all saying the dog listens to you (or the other person) more? Is the latter what you think "bonded" is? Or the former?

Benson sees me as the pack leader (I think, or at least I hope he does) and he obeys me pretty much all the time. Words or signals, he knows exactly what I want and he does it. I can get him to leave his dinner until I'm ready for him to eat it, I can get him to move off my bed, I can get him to do a u-turn when he's running towards something more exciting than me, and come right back to me.

He doesn't do anything my husband says.

Rick tells him to sit, Benson stands there and wags his tail. Rick tells him to move over and Benson climbs all over him and licks his face. Benson doesn't see Rick as someone who needs to be obeyed.

But he adores him. He clearly would prefer to be with him more than with me. He sits with him inside, he sleeps by Ricks side of the bed when he sleeps inside, he takes things and gives them to Rick and he just clearly prefers him to me. And that's OK cos I know he still loves me, he just likes Ricks company more.

[W Sibs]

Charlie is my dog. He chosed me.

From day dot... he followed me. He still follows me. He is such a mama's boy. He is happy to hang out with the boyfriend, boyfriend's brother and other family member but if I come into the room, his attention will be on me. He isn't as clingy as he use to be, but there are several time at night where he will stop playing with someone to check that i'm still around, come for a pat and cuddle.

Charlie perfers me over anyone and always listens to me. He sometimes listens to other people but most of the time he just rathers plays with them, when he is tired of them, he goes and looks for me for a nap. But, I do the majority of feeding, I train him, bathe him and set rules and boundaries for him... so he respects me most.