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"alpha Dog" Opinions Please


Guest HarperGD
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Guest lavendergirl

Tranquil paste is for horses but fine for dogs too. Never thought of using it on others ? Not a medication. A natural product containing Tryptophan, vitamin B1, magnesium & a few other vitamins & minerals. Has a soothing effect but does not make them dopey or go to sleep. Works a treat on my boys when girls are on heat & they are edgy. It helps with nervousness.

Thanks Christina - I might give this a try for my little guy.

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I'll just keep my reply to doggie matters - Harper my OH goes away for variable lengths of time too, and he winds the dogs up when he gets home which is the worst thing you can do for separation distress :rolleyes:

Although we never had our dogs as pups, they did pine when he first started going away, and getting crazy about the time he should be home, barking, being noise-reactive, staring at the door and the like. These days they just accept that he'll be back when he's back and are happy to see him when they can (which is pretty much how I see things too). We didn't do anything to train this, they just worked it out on their own.

Anyway, after a few deployments hopefully your pup will start to click that your OH will keep coming home, and pupski has you as a solid influence. Increasing age and confidence of your pup should help too :)

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Increasing age and confidence of your pup should help too :)

Not necessarily. I know a 13 year old poodle that STILL screams his head off when his owner leaves him.

It's unlikely to hinder, at least :D

If other variables don't change, there's no reason to believe that age alone will solve the problem (as with any other puppy issue).

This is a very young dog. The time to nip this in the bud is NOW. If the OP returns, I can only advise her to summon a decent behaviourist and not to spit the dummy if she's told that her emotional state could be having a direct impact on her dog.

Edited by poodlefan
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If other variables don't change, there's no reason to believe that age alone will solve the problem (as with any other puppy issue).

This is a very young dog. The time to nip this in the bud is NOW. If the OP returns, I can only advise her to summon a decent behaviourist and not to spit the dummy if she's told that her emotional state could be having a direct impact on her dog.

Fair enough, but the OP seems keen to learn about dog training and behaviour and do what it takes for the pup, so that is a lot more than the majority of dog owners out there. And she's shown she's willing to call in a professional when warranted, even if did turn out to be a dud in that instance. So I guess I'm not seeing huge red flags for the future of this pup.

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Fair enough, but the OP seems keen to learn about dog training and behaviour and do what it takes for the pup, so that is a lot more than the majority of dog owners out there. And she's shown she's willing to call in a professional when warranted, even if did turn out to be a dud in that instance. So I guess I'm not seeing huge red flags for the future of this pup.

People can flame me for this but what I see is a very sensitive breed (and potentially an even more sensitive pup) in a situation wrife with emotion and stress. Most folk will tell you this is not a recipe that will see such a dog thrive.

We have a pup that's had changes in pack membership (partner gone, parents added), changes in where he lives (now at parents) and a lot of instability. Flame away but if the pup is coping better living with Harper's parents, I'd be leaving him there, potentially permanently but at least until her partner returns.

Poodles don't have a reputation as being neurotic for no reason. In the wrong situation, that's precisely what they can become. Advice was given earlier about getting this pup to regular training, to build confidence and get some balance into his life. We never got a response on whether or not that occured.

This pup's situation has worried me from the get go. Sadly, I'm not seeing much to change my mind. Call me "pathetic" all you want HarperGD but ask yourself honestly if you're in any position now to give this pup what he needs.

Edited by poodlefan
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People can flame me for this but what I see is a very sensitive breed (and potentially an even more sensitive pup) in a situation wrife with emotion and stress. Most folk will tell you this is not not a recipe that will see such a dog thrive.

We have a pup that's had changes in pack membership (partner gone, parents added), changes in where he lives (now at parents) and a lot of instability. Flame away but if the pup is coping better livig with Harper's parents, I'd be leaving him there, potentially permanently but at least until her partner returns.

Poodles don't have a reputation as being neurotic for no reason. In the wrong situation, that's precisely what they can become.

This pup's situation has worried me from the get go. Sadly, I'm not seeing much to change my mind. Call me "pathetic" all you want HarperGD but ask yourself honestly if you're in a position to give this pup what he needs.

Well I'll defer to you on poodle-specific matters. I freely admit I see the dog world through the prism of "ruff tuff working dogs" (who just think they're lapdogs :rolleyes:). I haven't been following the whole story either, but I just think many people flounder with a new pup, not all seek help, so that's a good step HarperGD is taking.

I'll leave the flaming to others, not my style. Too many shades of grey here.

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Well I'll defer to you on poodle-specific matters. I freely admit I see the dog world through the prism of "ruff tuff working dogs" (who just think they're lapdogs :rolleyes:). I haven't been following the whole story either, but I just think many people flounder with a new pup, not all seek help, so that's a good step HarperGD is taking.

I'll leave the flaming to others, not my style. Too many shades of grey here.

Yes, many people flounder with a new pup. Most, if not all of us go through the "oh my God what HAVE I done" moment. But most of us don't organise another home in the first week before changing our mind and disappointing people.

HarperGD has choices. She can step up for this pup, make changes to herself to improve his situation and she can weather some critical posts.. or she can have a hissy fit, retreat into anonymous logging in and fume about all the cruel people taking pot shots at her because they don't understand how tough her situation is.

And if she does step up, she'll get nothing but praise and encouragement. Dog ownership can be a bit of a metaphor for life sometimes.. sometimes the advice you need to hear isn't the advice you want to hear but criticism can be constructive.

Her choice. She's got the advice she needs if she cares to act on it. :shrug:

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And yeah, we had trouble adjusting when Harper came along but you don't get a glimpse into our everyday life so how dare you pass such cruel judgement?

if this was aimed at me.... Re read my post, nothing harsh or rude there, just fact

Pretty sure it wasn't aimed at you GG85. I don't see anything you said being offensive to HarperGD.

Others on the other hand......... :bolt:

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Yes, many people flounder with a new pup. Most, if not all of us go through the "oh my God what HAVE I done" moment. But most of us don't organise another home in the first week before changing our mind and disappointing people.

HarperGD has choices. She can step up for this pup, make changes to herself to improve his situation and she can weather some critical posts.. or she can have a hissy fit, retreat into anonymous logging in and fume about all the cruel people taking pot shots at her because they don't understand how tough her situation is.

And if she does step up, she'll get nothing but praise and encouragement. Dog ownership can be a bit of a metaphor for life sometimes.. sometimes the advice you need to hear isn't the advice you want to hear but criticism can be constructive.

Her choice. She's got the advice she needs if she cares to act on it. :shrug:

As far as I can see that she made a choice to hire a trainer for her pup, made a choice to reach out to her parents for help with her living situation, and made choices to learn more about dogs and seek help on DOL. I don't know the situation with the rehoming (I do vaguely remember the thread), but weird things can happen when there's no family there to bounce ideas off. I know that's the reason why I have a backyard full of polypipe agility jumps.

Dogs, like humans, sometimes end up in less than ideal situations and muddle through. I'm sure there are ppl out there who think my kelpies have no business living in the suburbs, but I love them and have their best interests at heart, and I think they have a better life than many dogs languishing in backyards. I'm sure I've made mistakes with them, but we learn and move on.

Or maybe I'm just a softie and don't like seeing ppl being upset by the internets :shrug:

(edited for spelling)

Edited by Weasels
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I look at it like this Weasels..

Some dog breeds (and individuals) are emotional sponges. Whatever you throw at them, they soak it up and deal with it. These are the breeds and individuals that excel as therapy dogs for kids and for folk who have emotional issues. Two breeds often mentioned in this context are the CKCS and Golden Retriever.

Other breeds are more like mirrors... they reflect your emotional state. If you're upset, they're upset - they read you like a book. Be nervous as a trialler and they'll worry and lag. Have difficulty controlling your temper and they're miserable. I own two such breeds - the poodle and the whippet. For both breeds, one breed website starts its review with "be honest, is your home prone to upset or tension .. if so, this breed is not for you". BTW, most kelpies I've seen are mirrors.

Here we have a person going through a difficult time with a young dog that falls into the "emotional mirror" category. What he needs is stability in terms of routine, owner emotional state and home. He'd also benefit from activities that expand his horizons beyond his owner and his home. Whether his owner provides those is up to her.

Edited by poodlefan
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Hi Harper,

getting back to pups - things I have tried with my separation anxiety dog (now RIP), leaving the radio/tv on for sound, giving breakfast as a largish meal, leaving yummy stuff to chew (in my case, pigs ears - but quin was larger than your guy, training/walks before breakfast/leaving, no interaction with pup 20 minutes before leaving the house. Leave,no looking back, no goodbye message, just leave as though is is normal in every single way.

And yes he is probably picking up on your emotional state - but that is one of the things we like about having dogs. Also someone mentioned support for the defense forces 'support staff' (ie spouses) - give that a go. Its always nice to talk to people who are going thru the same situation as you are (which is, after all, why we are all on DOL. So we can talk dog without having to watch someone elses' eyes glaze over). And its a nice way of making more friends too.

Also, its another change in routine, and he'll take time to get used to that, too.

ChristineX

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My dog was / is also prone to separation anxiety. I can stash food around the house for her but it's almost all of it still there when I get home. Only the very special treats like roo chews are gone when I get back. And that's an improvement on when she was younger, when she wouldn't touch anything.

It's been good for the furniture.

I don't tell her I'm leaving but my actions do - getting my coat and bag and keys. She usually goes to bed and stays there until I get back. Sometimes I want to take her with - and it's a bit hard to get her off her bed like she doesn't believe me.

When I get back - I go straight through the house and open the back door to let her out for a potty break and I don't talk to her or look at her until she's done. I think this helps.

Some people really enjoy the mad party with the dog when they get home - but it needs to be on your terms eg go out the back - have potty break and then have mad party with permission or on command.

Harper

Don't let a few posts that rub you the wrong way stop you from getting the good stuff on here. There is an ignore feature so you don't even see the posts of people who really upset you (intentionally or not).

You can do this by clicking on your own user name (top right) and selecting the bottom item "manage ignored users", you can either paste or type in the user name that you want to not see the posts of (you will still see they posted, just not the content).

Hope you hang round and get into a bit of dog training. Poodles can be extremely clever and fun to train - obedience competitions were originally created by a poodle owner to show off how smart their dogs were.

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I look at it like this Weasels..

Some dog breeds (and individuals) are emotional sponges. Whatever you throw at them, they soak it up and deal with it. These are the breeds and individuals that excel as therapy dogs for kids and for folk who have emotional issues. Two breeds often mentioned in this context are the CKCS and Golden Retriever.

Other breeds are more like mirrors... they reflect your emotional state. If you're upset, they're upset - they read you like a book. Be nervous as a trialler and they'll worry and lag. Have difficulty controlling your temper and they're miserable. I own two such breeds - the poodle and the whippet. For both breeds, one breed website starts its review with "be honest, is your home prone to upset or tension .. if so, this breed is not for you". BTW, most kelpies I've seen are mirrors.

Here we have a person going through a difficult time with a young dog that falls into the "emotional mirror" category. What he needs is stability in terms of routine, owner emotional state and home. He'd also benefit from activities that expand his horizons beyond his owner and his home. Whether his owner provides those is up to her.

Yep, I see what you're saying, well put. I just hope things can work out for both the humans and the dog involved, even with a shaky start.

(yes I think my kelpies, at least, are mirrors. I hear people talk about how their dogs get all symapthetic if they are tired or ill, mine just get more uptight and attention seeking. It's a good motivator to leave the stress at the door.)

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