Colliewood Posted September 8, 2008 Share Posted September 8, 2008 Hi, I need to write a letter for a client outlining the condition of a dog they were given. The previous owner is taking them to court. Long long story and so much has happened I cannot get into it but there is no way this dog can go back. It was in atrocious condition ( Bichon x Pooldle) very scared and on the thin side. It's new owners love this dog to bits and the dog truly hit the jackpot when they got her. They look after her well, take her everywhere with them and as they are an older couple she really is keeping them active. She is walked a few times a day. I need to write about her condition back then and her current condition. (I have photos) I just need help in how to word it. I am sure you guys know what to say and how to get the best impact. ta Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~Anne~ Posted September 8, 2008 Share Posted September 8, 2008 Who is the letter to? I would be including a statement or two, from someone qualified such as a Vet, about her previous and current condition at the very least. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Colliewood Posted September 8, 2008 Author Share Posted September 8, 2008 Who is the letter to? I would be including a statement or two, from someone qualified such as a Vet, about her previous and current condition at the very least. Sorry , it is the new owners solicitor. They are getting something from the vet also, I am just adding my bit from a grooming perspective. I just thought this may have been asked before as I want to really get the message across well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~Anne~ Posted September 8, 2008 Share Posted September 8, 2008 Keep your sentences simple, short and factual and include as many evidence based statements as you can. When you write it, if you are not fabulous with words, try writing your sentence in your way and then using the thesaurus in Word to find more impact making words. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShesaLikeableBiBear Posted September 9, 2008 Share Posted September 9, 2008 (edited) Date Your name and address Solicitors Address TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN BICHON-POODLE CROSS (NAME OF DOG) On (whatever date) (name of dog) was brought to me to be clipped and bathed. Or: During the period (dates) (name of dog) was brought to me to be clipped and bathed. I am a dog groomer of (state how many years experience you have.) My observations were that the dog was Badly matted Appeared malnourished Very timid Since being re-homed (date) (name of dog) (state the condition now) Photographs showing the condition this dog was in prior to/and since being re-homed are available if required. Yours faithfully PS It wont do it with this post, but make sure you centre the To whom it may concern and the following two lines Edited September 9, 2008 by Hesapandabear Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greytdog Posted September 9, 2008 Share Posted September 9, 2008 Do not be emotive, keep it factual. I prefer to stay away from "I think" and use phrases like "it was evident that.." and "on examination, it was found.....". If you feel that a personal opinion is called for, put it as a summation at the end, and do not forget to include your professional qualifications, years of experience and maybe something to the effect that you have worked on many different breeds. Good luck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bonnie N Her Aussie Posted September 9, 2008 Share Posted September 9, 2008 I'd be doing it in essay format. eg: - Prepare an outline or diagram of your ideas. - Write your thesis statement. - Write the body. - Write the main points. ...Write the subpoints. ...Elaborate on the subpoints. - Write the introduction. - Write the conclusion. - Add the finishing touches. - Have someone proof read. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~Anne~ Posted September 9, 2008 Share Posted September 9, 2008 PS It wont do it with this post, but make sure you centre the To whom it may concern and the following two lines Centre them?? I wouldn't. Professional letters are always left aligned. The writers details would be right aligned or in a header/footer or on letterhead and the adressee details left aligned under this. The date can be either written above the addressee details or beneath the signature lines at the bottom. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bonnie N Her Aussie Posted September 9, 2008 Share Posted September 9, 2008 Hi, I need to write a letter for a client outlining the condition of a dog they were given. The previous owner is taking them to court. Long long story and so much has happened I cannot get into it but there is no way this dog can go back. It was in atrocious condition ( Bichon x Pooldle) very scared and on the thin side. It's new owners love this dog to bits and the dog truly hit the jackpot when they got her. They look after her well, take her everywhere with them and as they are an older couple she really is keeping them active. She is walked a few times a day. I need to write about her condition back then and her current condition. (I have photos) I just need help in how to word it. I am sure you guys know what to say and how to get the best impact. ta Might I suggest using power words. strong and professional words that are of a more higher standard. eg: "Emaciated" or "undernourished" rather then "very skinny". "Nervious", "Anxious", "frightened" rather then "scared". "Adore", "dote on", "admire" rather then "love" - also add that the feeling is mutual and the dog is now very positive, happy and confident in it's new surrondings. If the dog has any fears toward particular men or children due to tail pulling or anything - mention those behaviours. goodluck. PM me if i can help in anyway. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShesaLikeableBiBear Posted September 9, 2008 Share Posted September 9, 2008 Perhaps age has reared its ugly head PRS. In my day as a Refugee Status Determination Officer for UNHCR where we dealt on a daily basis with many law firms this was how we wrote our covering letters, NEVER were the writers details right aligned To each his own Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~Anne~ Posted September 9, 2008 Share Posted September 9, 2008 Perhaps age has reared its ugly head PRS. In my day as a Refugee Status Determination Officer for UNHCR where we dealt on a daily basis with many law firms this was how we wrote our covering letters, NEVER were the writers details right aligned To each his own Yes, I know the age thing, they are always springing new ways of setting out correspondance on us...and some of the changes I can't take to, like the idea of putting the date under the sig at the bottom. However, on a personal letter, the writer's details have always been right aligned to my knowledge. If you have letterhead, or a letterhead style such as those using headers and footers, this detail is here. Business letters are usually on letterhead and so you have no need to add the details. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bonnie N Her Aussie Posted September 9, 2008 Share Posted September 9, 2008 that's how it was at school too. details to the top right. letter to the bottom left. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pug Hugger Posted September 9, 2008 Share Posted September 9, 2008 As someone who works in a law firm short and sweet - straight to the point and in nice short paragraphs or dot points is excellent!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Colliewood Posted September 9, 2008 Author Share Posted September 9, 2008 Thanks everyone!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Colliewood Posted September 9, 2008 Author Share Posted September 9, 2008 short and sweet Bit like Louie - Huh!! Gonna get myself a Pug one day!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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