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Considering Rehoming. How Do You Choose Who?


Sharna3
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So, we have 2 dogs. Female Husky - Jazz, 7.5yrs, had her for 6.5 (got her as a rescue @ 10mths). Male Mastiff - Harley x, 22mths, had him since he was 6 weeks. (Yes, I know that's too early, long story and not the point). Both are sterilised.

We got Harley as we had lost our Rotti and Jazz was starting to fret. She'd always had a packmate, and after a few weeks alone she started to get very mopey and depressed. The dogs got along brilliantly until Harley hit about 14mths. They had 4 fights over the space of a month, the first one instigated by Jazz 100% and the other two more of an even fault thing. During this period Harley got sterilised and that, plus our efforts at behaviour mod and we also went to a very good dog behaviourist, seemed to help immensely and the 'pack' was fight free for months.

We've just moved - 6 weeks ago - and the fighting has abruptly returned. They were fine the first 3-4 weeks then have had 3 fights in the space of 10 days or so. All of these fights seem to be the result of Jazz becoming defensive and Harley either misinterpreting OR taking the 'opportunity' and he then attacks her.

He has a good 5 inches and 25kg on her, so its no fair fight. He is not inflicting serious damage on her physically however she is definitely becoming more and more unsure of him which is perpetuating the cycle.

We are still working with our behaviourist and have hope that these two may still resolve this behaviour but it was inevitable that the last resort option of rehoming one of them has to be considered. Aside from how heart breaking this would be for us - the difficulty is trying to work out who to rehome? Do we go with our inital heart reaction and keep the dog that we had first who has been with us for years and years? Or do we look at it from a 'who could be more successfully rehomed' perspective?

Would appreciate advice from anyone who's had to consider this horrible option ... I know every situation is different but just looking for any sharing.

Thanks.

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Not an easy decision and I feel for you.

My life fell apart about 10 yrs ago and I had to make a decision to lose 1 dog. I tried to re-home the younger one but at 6 no-one wanted him. I ended up having the older one PTS at 9. (Both large dogs) The vet was excellent and comforted me while understanding and supporting my decision. I still remember him saying that she was getting on and probably not far from her life going downhill anyway. Took a long time to get over and it still upsets me.

My only advise is to think carefully about all your options and go with your head as well as your heart.

Good luck with whatever you choose.

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We are still working with our behaviourist and have hope that these two may still resolve this behaviour but it was inevitable that the last resort option of rehoming one of them has to be considered. Aside from how heart breaking this would be for us - the difficulty is trying to work out who to rehome? Do we go with our inital heart reaction and keep the dog that we had first who has been with us for years and years? Or do we look at it from a 'who could be more successfully rehomed' perspective?

Would appreciate advice from anyone who's had to consider this horrible option ... I know every situation is different but just looking for any sharing.

Thanks.

Rehoming isn't always a last resort or always an option.

Your behaviourist should be able to give you more insight into the behaviour and what might be triggering it. With that information you can then decide whether rehoming is the right thing to do. Then, only if one of the dogs is suitable to be rehomed you need to think about what sort of home would best suit the dog.

What has your behaviourists advised? Maybe you need better help with this?

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My 2 bitches who had been best friends for 5yrs had a horrible fight which nearly killed one of them. They were 5 & 6yrs old. I love both and would not consider parting with either dog. So i keep them separate using toddler gates and crates when indoors, and if one is outside the other is inside. Ive gotten used to it and while its a hassle its better than the alternative. I exercise them separately too. Its now over a year later and there's been no further incidents as they have never been together without some kind of barrier between them. The golden stays inside while im at work, the kelpie cross is outside unless its too hot, then shes crated indoors in the aircon or in the bathroom behind a toddler gate. I know they miss each other but i cant risk them having another fight. The next fight might kill the kelpie. I have 2 large male dogs too that get along with both girls so they each still have a playmate and someone to go on walks with.

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We are still working with our behaviourist and have hope that these two may still resolve this behaviour but it was inevitable that the last resort option of rehoming one of them has to be considered. Aside from how heart breaking this would be for us - the difficulty is trying to work out who to rehome? Do we go with our inital heart reaction and keep the dog that we had first who has been with us for years and years? Or do we look at it from a 'who could be more successfully rehomed' perspective?

Would appreciate advice from anyone who's had to consider this horrible option ... I know every situation is different but just looking for any sharing.

Thanks.

Your behaviourist should be able to give you more insight into the behaviour and what might be triggering it. With that information you can then decide whether rehoming is the right thing to do. Then, only if one of the dogs is suitable to be rehomed you need to think about what sort of home would best suit the dog.

What has your behaviourists advised? Maybe you need better help with this?

We are working to identify the triggers, but they keep changing with every instance. As to her advice, she has raised this as a last resort - she has met both dogs and thinks they are both good individuals but as she says, sometimes two dogs just don't get along, and it may not be an 'issue' of either dog, but a personality clash. When you say "Maybe you need better help with this?" - what do you mean?

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We are still working with our behaviourist and have hope that these two may still resolve this behaviour but it was inevitable that the last resort option of rehoming one of them has to be considered. Aside from how heart breaking this would be for us - the difficulty is trying to work out who to rehome? Do we go with our inital heart reaction and keep the dog that we had first who has been with us for years and years? Or do we look at it from a 'who could be more successfully rehomed' perspective?

Would appreciate advice from anyone who's had to consider this horrible option ... I know every situation is different but just looking for any sharing.

Thanks.

Your behaviourist should be able to give you more insight into the behaviour and what might be triggering it. With that information you can then decide whether rehoming is the right thing to do. Then, only if one of the dogs is suitable to be rehomed you need to think about what sort of home would best suit the dog.

What has your behaviourists advised? Maybe you need better help with this?

We are working to identify the triggers, but they keep changing with every instance. As to her advice, she has raised this as a last resort - she has met both dogs and thinks they are both good individuals but as she says, sometimes two dogs just don't get along, and it may not be an 'issue' of either dog, but a personality clash. When you say "Maybe you need better help with this?" - what do you mean?

A behaviourist should be able to offer a little more insight than that. Sometimes dogs just don't get along, but that is often to do with one dog more than the other. Did they give you a management plan? I wouldn't be happy to pay for a behaviourist only to be told both dogs are 'good' and one might need to be rehomed.

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Sometimes dogs don't get along and sometimes a management plan can't work practically. My dogs are my family but if I had to permanently separate them it wouldn't work. I simply wouldn't be able to spend enough time with each and give them the life that I believe a dog deserves. Others are different and deal with the separation, but it isn't for me.

Maybe seek a second opinion and then have a good, honest think about whether you can execute a management plan for the rest of their lives. Often things are good for a month or two because we're extra careful then let our guard down then BAM!

If you get to the point of rehoming one of your dogs - and sometimes it is easily forgotten that there isn't anything wrong with responsibly rehoming a dog as long as everyone's interests are catered for - you'd need to think about:

* who would be a better rehoming prospect (personally, I'd be very wary of rehoming a mastiff x that had been in a number of fights because I'd imagine a lot of undesirables would see this as appealing).

* what kind of home would best meet their needs, and vice versa

* what kind of home you can provide the dog that stays (ie what is best for their needs too).

Good luck. You are in an unenviable situation. I hope they are being kept separated until the situation is resolved?

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My 2 bitches who had been best friends for 5yrs had a horrible fight which nearly killed one of them. They were 5 & 6yrs old. I love both and would not consider parting with either dog. So i keep them separate using toddler gates and crates when indoors, and if one is outside the other is inside. Ive gotten used to it and while its a hassle its better than the alternative. I exercise them separately too. Its now over a year later and there's been no further incidents as they have never been together without some kind of barrier between them. The golden stays inside while im at work, the kelpie cross is outside unless its too hot, then shes crated indoors in the aircon or in the bathroom behind a toddler gate. I know they miss each other but i cant risk them having another fight. The next fight might kill the kelpie. I have 2 large male dogs too that get along with both girls so they each still have a playmate and someone to go on walks with.

Yep this is where we are at now - we are keeping them seperated eg one in one out or in seperate rooms. Its a bit of a pain for us but I agree its better than either them fighting or losing one of them. The problem with this though is that the Sibe's anxiety levels are still quite high, whenever she can see the Mastiff x, even through a barrier, she starts to display anxiety and I hate the thought of her next seven years being stressful on a daily basis :-(

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A behaviourist should be able to offer a little more insight than that. Sometimes dogs just don't get along, but that is often to do with one dog more than the other. Did they give you a management plan? I wouldn't be happy to pay for a behaviourist only to be told both dogs are 'good' and one might need to be rehomed.

Oh, ok. Yes - sorry, she's given us lots of insight I just was trying to keep my OP from being War and Peace. The initial trigger was the Sibe food guarding and she attacked the Mastiff x. So then he learned that from her - unfortunately she thought she could guard his food too, and then he went her.

The last major fight they had before 'peace time', it only stopped because the Sibe finally submitted - I couldn't seperate them. If she'd stay submissive, I am sure it would be OK, however the latest fights it seems she displays what is I feel is defensive behaviour - he approaches, she turns side on, lowers her head and looks at him sideways. He then stiffens - if she took this point to drop to a submissive position I think he'd walk away however she stands her ground and he then must take that as a challenge and he attacks her.

She's quite anxious and he is quite confident. We are being as vigilant as possible and managing the triggers - but its being made more difficult by the triggers changing :(

We are also trying lots of positive reinforcements, behaviour mods, etc. Hoping it works.

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My 2 bitches who had been best friends for 5yrs had a horrible fight which nearly killed one of them. They were 5 & 6yrs old. I love both and would not consider parting with either dog. So i keep them separate using toddler gates and crates when indoors, and if one is outside the other is inside. Ive gotten used to it and while its a hassle its better than the alternative. I exercise them separately too. Its now over a year later and there's been no further incidents as they have never been together without some kind of barrier between them. The golden stays inside while im at work, the kelpie cross is outside unless its too hot, then shes crated indoors in the aircon or in the bathroom behind a toddler gate. I know they miss each other but i cant risk them having another fight. The next fight might kill the kelpie. I have 2 large male dogs too that get along with both girls so they each still have a playmate and someone to go on walks with.

Yep this is where we are at now - we are keeping them seperated eg one in one out or in seperate rooms. Its a bit of a pain for us but I agree its better than either them fighting or losing one of them. The problem with this though is that the Sibe's anxiety levels are still quite high, whenever she can see the Mastiff x, even through a barrier, she starts to display anxiety and I hate the thought of her next seven years being stressful on a daily basis :-(

This is the sort of thing where a behaviourist might suggest ways of reducing the dog's anxiety. But without seeing what is happening with both dogs over time, it's impossible for anyone here to give meaningful advice. Anxiety is a problem, and it wouldn't be right to just rehome an anxious dog. An anxious dog isn't good. But could there be something about the mastiff's behaviour that is likely to cause anxiety in a normal dog? A really good behaviourist should be able to provide a little more insight I think.

Have both dogs had a very thorough vet exam? That should always be the first step.

I have seen situations where separation was not a practical solution, but in those cases, rehoming wasn't either.

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Sometimes dogs don't get along and sometimes a management plan can't work practically. My dogs are my family but if I had to permanently separate them it wouldn't work. I simply wouldn't be able to spend enough time with each and give them the life that I believe a dog deserves. Others are different and deal with the separation, but it isn't for me.

Maybe seek a second opinion and then have a good, honest think about whether you can execute a management plan for the rest of their lives. Often things are good for a month or two because we're extra careful then let our guard down then BAM!

If you get to the point of rehoming one of your dogs - and sometimes it is easily forgotten that there isn't anything wrong with responsibly rehoming a dog as long as everyone's interests are catered for - you'd need to think about:

* who would be a better rehoming prospect (personally, I'd be very wary of rehoming a mastiff x that had been in a number of fights because I'd imagine a lot of undesirables would see this as appealing).* what kind of home would best meet their needs, and vice versa

* what kind of home you can provide the dog that stays (ie what is best for their needs too).

Good luck. You are in an unenviable situation. I hope they are being kept separated until the situation is resolved?

Thank you :-) A second opinion is tough as we live in an isolated community, but I am going to try our local canine club.

As to the choice of rehoming, from a practical POV, the Husky, though older, is definitely the 'better' prospect in terms of size, breed, behaviour. The Mastiff I would worry about for the exact reason you mention, plus he has a lot of allergies and his size make him less of an attractive prospect to genuine families. That said - would we blame him for having to give her up?

*sigh* I am SO hoping we manage to bring this to a peaceful, happy solution that includes keeping both dogs happy and healthy and with us.

And yep they are kept seperated with some monitored contact.

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So - it all started when your sibe was resource guarding - the mastiffX then took control.. and now he is instigating the fights, and the sibe displays anxiety when he is around.

Is that it in the condensed version?

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So - it all started when your sibe was resource guarding the mastiffX then took control.. and now he is instigating the fights, and the sibe displays anxiety when he is around.

Is that it in the condensed version?

Exactly. And it seems that anxiety is misinterpreted by him OR he's a complete a**hole and seizes the opportunity to hurt her when she's at her most vunerable. But judging him by his behaviour previously with her, with other dogs and with us, I can't see that. But I have to consider it.

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So - it all started when your sibe was resource guarding - the mastiffX then took control.. and now he is instigating the fights, and the sibe displays anxiety when he is around.

Is that it in the condensed version?

I think the change of "territory" and the re-establishment and ownership of it has to play some part too. (i.e. house shift)

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If you had to rehome as a last resort I personally would look at the younger one as I think it would be easier to find a home for.

I had to rehome a 18 month golden retriever once due to circumstances out of my control. The people that adopted him were great.. lived not far from me & they were happy for us to visit whenever.

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I had to rehome a GSD once, got her a as a pup but her prey drive was too much for our cats to handle, after 2 years of behaviourists I spoke to a friend in canberra who had always loved her and we decided it was for the best. I think in 4 week if you keep up with a strict training schedule the dogs will get along again, it's the stress of moving on top of territorial behaviour and dominance

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I think in 4 week if you keep up with a strict training schedule the dogs will get along again,

is this for the OP's dogs?

I'm not sure how you can make a suggestion like that with no real knowledge of the dogs/their housing situation/capability of owner, or quality of professional help they are getting..

It's a very tricky seeming situation.. and, Sharna, I wish for you an acceptable outcome . :hug:

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I had to rehome a GSD once, got her a as a pup but her prey drive was too much for our cats to handle, after 2 years of behaviourists I spoke to a friend in canberra who had always loved her and we decided it was for the best. I think in 4 week if you keep up with a strict training schedule the dogs will get along again, it's the stress of moving on top of territorial behaviour and dominance

I wouldn't be giving these types of assurances over the internet.

I wish you luck, it doesn't sound like an easy situation to be in. I hope you are able to find help at your club!

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I didn't mean to make assurances, this is what it sounds like to me, sicne the dogs were fine before. i had a similar thing happen. Jumping the gun and rehoming the dog for somethign that could possibly be rectified will be sad for everyone involved.

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