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Tess


Pheebs
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Thanks for your kind words, guys.

I'm just heart-broken and even though she was an aging chook who was happy in her own little spot on the couch and never moved about much, the house just feels very, very empty and quiet.

As soon as we came home from the vet at about 3am, poor little Lucy wrapped herself in the tightest ball I think possible and wouldn't budge for a day. Just so distressing to see. Things are slowly getting back to normal and we're trying to establish a routine for the other two but they are particularly sooky (more so than usual) which i'm guessing will pass.

I swap so easily between moments where I think we did the right thing for her, and then punishing myself in thinking maybe there was more we could have done, what didn't I consider, etc.

I know she was getting old and arthritic but I honestly (foolishly) thought that she would go quietly. I can't believe we only had two weeks with her after having been told she was sick. I'm also trying to shake the memory of her last moments where she snapped. It wasn't aggressive by any stretch thank god - but she was happily trotting in the backyard after having been out for a wee-break when in a matter of seconds she went insane. I knew she was a dog that had a lot of strength but she was displaying super-human strength (for lack of a better word) to chase/get to something that just wasn't there. Her pupils were fixed and dilated and we had to wrap her in a blanket to stop her from hurting herself and pin her to the ground. She was running around with no control of her legs but that didn't stop her from getting up - bolting, collapsing and doing it all over again. It was just horrible and I can't shake this memory.

(I also feel somewhat embarrassed that when all was said and done, my partner told the vet to advise her remaining staff to "go get f*cked" after the only two staff members who specialised in neurology were both on scheduled holidays at the same time so no-one was able to answer my calls on the afternoon where I observed that she was deteriorating and queried whether I could return her to the heavier dose of steroid that she was on initially). The administration woman who answered my phone call was also a horrible piece of work. After Tess snapped, we asked for a very quick minute to say our goodbyes to her - we didn't want to prolong it or distress her further (and advised the staff of this) and were left in the room for about 15 minutes with Tess crying, very anxious and confused and to have not one, but two cleaners come in and remove rubbish from the room whilst we were trying to say our goodbyes only served to add fuel to the fire).

The whole experience was just awful. I left a voicemail for the neurologist saying not to bother returning my call as she had died. He called about an hour later and apologised for having missed my call and was very kind. He comforted me in the sense that the way in which she snapped led him to diagnose that it was in fact a brain tumour, not an inflammatory brain disease or a stroke like they had also considered. I feel somewhat better as I know this was totally out of my hands but I can't help but feel like I let her down.

tessy.jpg

Edited by Pheebs
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dear Pheebs, I'm so sorry for the loss of your beautiful girl. Don't ever feel that you let her down, you gave her a wonderful life and you gave her her wings without letting her suffer. She loved you as much as you loved her and I am sure she is looking down on you with love and gratitude.

Big hugs.

RIP Tess.

P.S. The first photo you posted is gorgeous. I hope you have it framed.

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Pheebs I am so sorry for your loss... what a beautiful girl Tess was and you did your very best for her to the very end... including a very memorable and beautiful tribute to her which has moved plenty of people I am sure.

On a side note, perhaps you should consider putting in a complaint regarding the vet... what a disrespectful way that they dealt with you and tess during such a difficult time...

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Dear Pheebs, I am so sorry to read about the loss of your beautiful girl Tess. You may not remember, but I was privileged to meet Tess when she was living with Knobbles.

My daughter and I both fell in love with her then, she was stunning, an absolutely gorgeous girl. I have just told my daughter about Tess and she is very upset.

She said Tess was the first Weimaraner she ever met and she fell in love with the breed because of her. :thumbsup:

Here are a couple of photos I took of Tess that day. Even though it was five years ago we have never forgotten her. She was an amazing girl and I know that her passing will have left a huge hole in your heart. :laugh:

Tess.jpg

Tess2.jpg

RIP Tess with no more pain and suffering! :confused: Wait for your mum at the rainbow bridge just as you so patiently waited for her all those years ago.

You are a good girl and your mummy will miss you very much. Those of us who were privileged to have met you are feeling just a tiny amount of what your mum is feeling, and we are very sad.

We will never forget you! :o

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Wendy thank you so much for your kind words, thoughts and (much needed) photos of Tess - I certainly do remember knobbles telling me that you had met her and I remember wishing I had the chance to meet both you and Breanna!!

I don't have many words at present but am just so very grateful for those photos - thank you xx

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  • 4 months later...

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