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Time To Order Your Christmas Puppies!


poodlefan
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Deshonko, you could be just the (maniac) genius I'm looking for. I'd like the temperament of a Golden Retriever, the size of my Lakeland Terrier and if you could make it non-shedding that would be fabulous 'cos I can't be bothered with the cleaning.

Many thanks

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Any chance of a red schnauzer?

;)

IrishTerrierQuigley3.jpg

Beat me to it! :p :wave: The number of times Ruby has been a "red schnauzer"...

Yes, Izzy too - especially as she's schnauzer size....

Do they come in teacup size? this one looks a bit tall and lanky. Maybe something with a flat face, these beards just get to messy

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Any chance of a red schnauzer?

;)

IrishTerrierQuigley3.jpg

Beat me to it! :D :wave: The number of times Ruby has been a "red schnauzer"...

Yes, Izzy too - especially as she's schnauzer size....

Do they come in teacup size? this one looks a bit tall and lanky. Maybe something with a flat face, these beards just get to messy

images.jpg

Maybe Deshonko can make you one without the beard? :p

Edited by Crazy Daisy
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Hi,

found your email on the notice board at kmart and it said you sell poerbred dogs guarnteed like

I want a dog for me mother inlaw cose she says she hates dogs and i want to make her like em.

i want one that onoly sh*ts little bits and only eats leftovers cose she dont want to buy food for the "freaking dog"

and one that dont drink cose we have water restrctions dontcha now but i supose ican give it the left over burbon if i have too

is there any sort of dog that she can tye up all day so it dont sh*t everywhere on her noice concrete yard.

oh it it better not bark or she will get real p*ssed off at yous

can i get her one wif papers so we can show the neighburs how spech we are having a poerbred dog

i might evn take it to dog shows if its tuff enoguh

if i get a girl dog can i make it have pups ???? cose i got me a spesh dog here that would make ace babies and i want me kids to see what having babies is all about.

am thiking one that dont have much hair you now them short hairs ones so i dont have to clean up after the freakn thing.

can i get it a bit cheaper cose its going to a great home and i will promise to feed it most days.

do you have them tuff ones like evn a rare bluey one cose i got me a great studded collr that i want to use i found it at the tip and its to good to wast

now cose sthe b*tch dont like dogs i will have to get it already trained like so how much xxx is that gunna cost it bettr not be too much or else

can i pay for it next fortngiht cose i m selling me torana next week so i can have some cash them

if you can send me some shots of what i should get her cose you are the xpert and nw what sort she should have

and she just told me she wants one wif 2 differnt colrd eyes is that extra if it is can i pay it off or will you take a swap wif me torana

fanks i will be waitinf for your call

call me on 1800callmenow

Aww mate we gots a grate offer on right now, buy one get one free. Y's know our stock is top quality coz if it dies we'll replace it.

Now what kinda people would we be if we didn't offer that kind of thing; replace your worn out, boring dog with a new, exciting puppy! And we'll do that every year if you want, join our Puppy Savers Club and every time you return a puppy you get 30% off the price of your next one.

Sweet deal bro!

Our dogs are fully sik, they're tough as sh*t and will maul the ever loving crap outta people who wanna steal your sweet as 40" plasma, but the kiddies can whack it in the face with a plastic golf club and directly scream into it's face "bad dog!" afterwards and it won't do sh*t.

We gots some grouse offers on at the moment of fully trained, awesome dogs.

First up we got the Crak Hore Puppi, it's specially trained to help ya shoot up when you've collapsed in the caravan from ya last overdose.

It'll bring ya round with a shot to the neck before the coppas rock up.

Also, it has this hollow area inside it where you can hide ya stash; quite easy to use all ya do is open the trapdoor and stick your hand down the tunnel. Comes with red headlights that double as festive Christmas lights for your drug den.

Only $200, $100 if you promise a litter before it's a year old.

a2gqo5.jpg

Second we gots an grouse offer, the Child Friendly Perfect Dog.

Purebred Australian Staffy with some of that awesome dog next door put in. Top bloodlines.

We kept it pure of bad influence by keeping it locked in the spare bathroom with a slab of Chum and a bucket of water. When we take it out at 8 weeks {if it's alive}, it'll be awesome for a suprise gift for your ADHD 6 year old or your surly teenager.

Here is a picture from when we let our last one out of the bathroom, it's flying with glee towards our daughter $haniqua, practically convulsing with the desire to kiss her to....uhh....death.

$300, but $200 if you can promise two litters before it's a year old.

t7irr5.jpg

With every purchase you get a free retractable lead and a sack of Woofbix, plus a printed bit of paper with the name of your dog/s on it.

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*ding ding* Sorta serious interjection here. HeavyPaws, you have me in stitches with your commentary and your pics....BUT.....could you find a food other than Woofbix to slam pretty please? You'll actually find that there are quite a few very well known, very successful REPUTABLE breeders out there who feed this. Maybe Homebrand or even Chum would suit the requirements of your dogs better?

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Hi,

found your email on the notice board at kmart and it said you sell poerbred dogs guarnteed like

I want a dog for me mother inlaw cose she says she hates dogs and i want to make her like em.

i want one that onoly sh*ts little bits and only eats leftovers cose she dont want to buy food for the "freaking dog"

and one that dont drink cose we have water restrctions dontcha now but i supose ican give it the left over burbon if i have too

is there any sort of dog that she can tye up all day so it dont sh*t everywhere on her noice concrete yard.

oh it it better not bark or she will get real p*ssed off at yous

can i get her one wif papers so we can show the neighburs how spech we are having a poerbred dog

i might evn take it to dog shows if its tuff enoguh

if i get a girl dog can i make it have pups ???? cose i got me a spesh dog here that would make ace babies and i want me kids to see what having babies is all about.

am thiking one that dont have much hair you now them short hairs ones so i dont have to clean up after the freakn thing.

can i get it a bit cheaper cose its going to a great home and i will promise to feed it most days.

do you have them tuff ones like evn a rare bluey one cose i got me a great studded collr that i want to use i found it at the tip and its to good to wast

now cose sthe b*tch dont like dogs i will have to get it already trained like so how much xxx is that gunna cost it bettr not be too much or else

can i pay for it next fortngiht cose i m selling me torana next week so i can have some cash them

if you can send me some shots of what i should get her cose you are the xpert and nw what sort she should have

and she just told me she wants one wif 2 differnt colrd eyes is that extra if it is can i pay it off or will you take a swap wif me torana

fanks i will be waitinf for your call

call me on 1800callmenow

This is a masterpiece ;) Contains a dose of just about every bit of lunacy that's ever been uttered on the search for a new dog.

I'm so glad HeavyPaws came up with the Child Friendly Perfect Dog for such a discerning pet owner.

Edited by mita
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*ding ding* Sorta serious interjection here. HeavyPaws, you have me in stitches with your commentary and your pics....BUT.....could you find a food other than Woofbix to slam pretty please? You'll actually find that there are quite a few very well known, very successful REPUTABLE breeders out there who feed this. Maybe Homebrand or even Chum would suit the requirements of your dogs better?

Not serious: Nah bro Big DubbleYa's got a sale on now and you know the cheaper the better right

Serious: I forgot about Homebrand, to be totally honest. I'll change my tactics to include Homebrand instead of Woofbix. Side note, the Asian grocery near me sells dog food in a can for 30c a can. It's flavour can only be determined by the cartoon dog on the front, who wears either rabbit ears, cow horns or mop of wool on it's grinning head. I think it's called Lucky You Puppy. I think my pedigree pups may benefit from Lucky You.

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Side note, the Asian grocery near me sells dog food in a can for 30c a can. It's flavour can only be determined by the cartoon dog on the front, who wears either rabbit ears, cow horns or mop of wool on it's grinning head. I think it's called Lucky You Puppy. I think my pedigree pups may benefit from Lucky You.

Hmmmmmm....so is that Lucky You Puppy because you're eating it? Or Lucky You Puppy because you survived going in the tin?

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Whatever youse are all selling, if I buy two can I have the second one half price pls, chrstxbye. xx

Yeah mate but you gots to give us the puppies from your first litter, and the litter has to be born before the dog's first birthday.

If you want, I'll offer you this lovely breeding pair. The parents were litter mates, but it's alright, they're designer dogs so they don't get genetic mishaps.

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • 2 months later...

Is it too late to put in an order? I haven't done any Christmas shopping as yet and I figure your gifts are quick and easy for me to buy, give and forget about.

ETA

I forgot to ask too, are you doing half price specials at the moment like my local RSPCA? :D You know to get rid of excess stock before Christmas

Edited by rastus_froggy
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Never too late to get a pup from Deshonko.

All our Ponds Institute health certified pups are such a great bargain there's no need to discount! :D

AND of course Deshonko are big supporters of rescue work.

We take on plenty of undesexed dogs and provide them with homes here. :(

Have had quite a demand for these lately.. Feral Spitz pups. :(

4-fox-cubs.jpg

Edited by poodlefan
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Never too late to get a pup from Deshonko.

All our Ponds Institute health certified pups are such a great bargain there's no need to discount! :thumbsu:

AND of course Deshonko are big supporters of rescue work.

We take on plenty of undesexed dogs and provide them with homes here. :(

:D

Great!!

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