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Goodbye Cass


The PM
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Hello all,

Please bare with me, this is my first post here and is very difficult to write.

My beautiful 14 year old, 3 legged rottweiller Cassie died very suddenly at 11am yesterday morning.

I had her from when she was about 9 months old.A flatmate of my brother owned her and was going to have her put to sleep because he was moving.This was one of the best things that has ever happened to me, as Cass became my best friend. I suffer from severe psoriaisis all over my body but mostly on my face.Because of this I am also depressed quite often and Cass knew this and wouldn't leave my side when I had problems. I can honestly say that I came very close to doing something very silly about 6 years ago and the only reason I didn't was because Cass stopped me....she somehow knew.

She was also a brave girl.Two and a half years ago she went lame in her front left leg.This turned out to be a form of bone cancer , which we found before it had spread.She lost her leg, but when I bought her home from hospital after 4 days she was so pleased she jumped out of the car.After a month or so she was back chasing her mates Tia (a terrier x) and Ducky (a duck!) as if nothing was wrong and loving every second of it. Just a fortnight ago she chased Ducky (playfully...don't worry!)and ended up with a mouthful of down feathers.She spent the next 10 minutes trying to get them out of her mouth.

I came home from work yesterday morning at 10:30 and Cass and Tia where both at the front door waiting, with stump and tail wagging like you wouldn't belive, as they do every morning.I gave them their breakfast and sat down to read the papers.I heard an odd sound and saw Cass on the ground struggling.I knew she was in trouble and I don't know if she heard me saying goodbye and that I loved her.She stopped breathing after about a minute.

Today just didn't seem real.Cass not under her blanket in the morning, Cass not at the front door when i got home, Cass not trying to get my food off me, Cass not coming over to the couch to give me a dog kiss .

Sorry about the length of this post.I don't know who to talk to and I just hurt so much.

Goodbye my girl.Goodbye my friend.Goodbye Cassie.

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Edited by The PM
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So terribly saddened to read of the passing of your darling Cassie. :D :eek: My heart goes out to you as I know how devastated and profoundly sad you must be feeling right now in grieving for your beautiful girl - probably feels like your heart has been ripped out and you will be struggling to cope. :mad

You were both so lucky to find one another and she had a wonderful long life with you despite some tremendous odds. What a wonderfully brave and courageous girl she was.

RIP Cassie and run free at the :thumbsup: and hopefully you will get to meet my Cassie, my darling black Lab girl who is also at the bridge.

PM - if you do need to talk to someone who understands how you feel, please feel free to send me a PM (personal message) with your contact details as I know how difficult it is to handle the loss of such a beloved and treasured best friend.

Take care - Denise

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:D :eek::mad I really feel for you, and know that we are here for you, and it does not matter how long your post is.

I went through this devastating situation in February, when my dear old girl Mia went to the bridge, it hurts like hell and life does not seem the same.

Even to this day, when I am getting my other dogs their dinner, I pull out that fifth plate, look at it and burst into :eek: for that was Mia's plate, my dear old girl was going on for 11 1/2 years. Miss her like you would not believe.

Hopefully your Cass has found Cassie the Lab and Mia the French Bulldog at the :thumbsup:

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So sorry to hear about your sad loss. I have 3 dogs waiting for me at the bridge. When I lost the first one it was the greatest loss I had ever faced in my life. She was always there with me doing whatever I was doing and going everywhere with me. She has been gone over 16 years now and sometimes I still feel a lump in my throat when I think of her. Then I think of all the good times and the sun shines again.

The old adage remains true "to love and lost is better than to have never loved".

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I'm terribly sorry to hear about your loss of Cassie :)

I too lost my beloved old Rotty girl last November and in a lot of ways she was to me what Cassie was to you. I had numerous life changes- relationship breakups, housing issues and through it all, there was my little best friend at my side, smiling and trying to launch sneak attacks to give me a huge face lick! :rofl:

Don't be too hard on yourself, there will be numerous things that set you off and have you in floods of tears at the drop of a hat. This is normal when you lose someone so close to you and will also be balanced out by the little things that you remember that make you smile. After 6 months, I can honestly say that it does get a little easier.

Take care of yourself :)

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Hope this helps

> A Living Love

>

> If you ever love an animal, there are three days in your life you will

> always remember....

>

> The first is a day, blessed with happiness, when you bring home your

> young new friend.

> You may have spent weeks deciding on a breed. You may have asked

> numerous opinions of many vets, or done long research in finding a

> breeder. Or, perhaps in a fleeting moment, you may have just chosen

> that silly looking mutt in a shelter--simply because something in its

> eyes reached your heart. But when you bring that chosen pet home, and

> watch it explore, and claim its special place in your hall or front

> room--and when you feel it brush against you for the first time--it

> instills a feeling of pure love you will carry with you through the

> many years to come.

>

> The second day will occur eight or nine or ten years later.

> It will be a day like any other.

> Routine and unexceptional. But, for a surprising instant, you will

> look at your longtime friend and see age where you once saw youth. You

> will see slow deliberate steps where you once saw energy. And you will

> see sleep when you once saw activity. So you will begin to adjust your

> friend's diet--and you may add a pill or two to her food. And you may

> feel a growing fear deep within yourself, which bodes of a coming

> emptiness. And you will feel this uneasy feeling, on and off, until

> the third day finally arrives.

>

> And on this day--if your friend and God have not decided for you, then

> you will be faced with making a decision of your own--on behalf of

> your lifelong friend, and with the guidance of your own deepest

> Spirit. But whichever way your friend eventually leaves you--you will

> feel as alone as a single star in the dark night.

>

> If you are wise, you will let the tears flow as freely and as often as

> they must. And if you are typical, you will find that not many in your

> circle of family or friends will be able to understand your grief, or

> comfort you.

>

> But if you are true to the love of the pet you cherished through the

> many joy-filled years, you may find that a soul--a bit smaller in size

> than your own--seems to walk with you, at times, during the lonely

> days to come.

>

> And at moments when you least expect anything out of the ordinary to

> happen, you may feel something brush against your leg--very very

> lightly.

>

> And looking down at the place where your dear, perhaps dearest, friend

> used to lay--you will remember those three significant days. The

> memory will most likely to be painful, and leave an ache in your

> heart--As time passes the ache will come and go as if it has a life of

> its own.

> You will both reject it and embrace it, and it may confuse you. If you

> reject it, it will depress you. If you embrace it, it will deepen you.

> Either way, it will still be an ache.

>

> But there will be, I assure you, a fourth day when--along with the

> memory of your pet--and piercing through the heaviness in your

> heart--there will come a realization that belongs only to you. It will

> be as unique and strong as our relationship with each animal we have

> loved, and lost. This realization takes the form of a Living

> Love--like the heavenly scent of a rose that remains after the petals

> have wilted, this Love will remain and grow--and be there for us to

> remember. It is a love we have earned. It is the legacy our pets leave

> us when they go. And it is a gift we may keep with us as long as we

> live. It is a Love which is ours alone. And until we ourselves leave,

> perhaps to join our Beloved Pets--it is a Love we will always possess.

>

> (by Martin Scot Kosins)

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  • 2 weeks later...

Well, its been two weeks now since Cass passed. The hardest two weeks I have experienced in a very long time.

It is surprising how many little things that you normally don't even think of,remind you of good times. Yesterday afternoon, I was able to smile at one of these memories.I found a photo of Cass taken not long after I got her.In this photo she was peeking out from behind a lounge, and it took me a minute or so to remember that she was hiding from my brothers rabbit.This rabbit was extremely territorial and saw Cass as a threat and would charge at her whenever he saw her.As a result, for many years Cass would hide behind that lounge when visiting my brother, just to make sure the rabbit wasn't around.She would also hide whenever the vacuum cleaner would come on or I turned the hose on in the backyard.She would howl at the top of her voice whenever the phone rang.All good memories.

I also got a surprise the other morning.Every dog owner knows the shape of their dogs head, ears and nose when viewed from behind and above (like when you go far a walk).Last Friday morning, I switched on a light I don't normally switch on and a microwave steamer I left on the bench the previous night cast a shadow that was exactly the same shape as Cass' head. Pure coincidence of course but I had said "Good Morning Cass" before I knew it.

I'd like to thank those that have replied to this thread, emailed or PM'd me with messages of support, you have all helped.

Most of all, thank you Cass.Missing you like you wouldn't beleive.

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  • 11 months later...

Well it is 1 year tomorrow since you left us Cass and life still doesn't feel right.Poor little Tia is so lonely now that Ducky has gone as well and she has no one to chase around the yard whenever she wants.She still goes looking for you if she hears your name in conversation.

You are still helping me as well.Two weeks ago in hospital when they were cutting bits out of me (renal biopsy) I thought of nothing but the best times I had with you,to take my mind off all the bits and pieces being stuck into my back, and the hour and a bit seemed like only 10 minutes (ok maybe it was the light sedation! :cry: ) and I came through ok.

Will be thinking of you all day tomorrow and will be in the garden with you at 11am.

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  • 2 weeks later...

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