Staranais Posted May 7, 2011 Share Posted May 7, 2011 Maybe one of you choose the breed & the other choose the pup from the litter, or etc. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christina Posted May 7, 2011 Share Posted May 7, 2011 Doubt that letting him choose will make them bond. If he was a person that really liked dogs he would have bonded with the ones you have already because you can't help it when they are part of your family. As an example I would never go out & get a bull terrier, just not my kind of dog in looks or any way although I know their natures are beautiful However if circumstances landed one on me I know I would love it in no time. You can't not bond with a dog you have merely because of its breed or looks if you are a true dog lover. So when the time comes I would get what you & the children like & convince him its a wonderful choice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sas Posted May 7, 2011 Share Posted May 7, 2011 I think it depends on what you want from a dog and then you go through the process of elimination. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Spotted Devil Posted May 7, 2011 Share Posted May 7, 2011 Mr TSD leaves it completely up to me....I choose the breed, breeder, pup and if he's lucky he'll help name it. I do the vast majority of the feeding, exercising, health care, record keeping, training, competing and he gets to clean up the mess they make, spoil them rotten and have all the bragging rights 3 from 3 so far (plus the cats) so I have a pretty good track record. If it wasn't for me he would have a Greyhound but only because they aren't as high maintenance as our lot! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jacqui835 Posted May 7, 2011 Share Posted May 7, 2011 My partner and I don't really have similar taste in breeds - he likes the hunting hounds like vizlas and weims etc, and I like the guardian breeds. I knew him when I got my dobe, but we didn't live together and at that stage, he was actually scared of dobermans. Since then he has grown to love my dobe almost as much as I do, so I suppose I've been lucky. He wanted to choose our second dog and naturally tried to steer us towards a hunting breed - I felt like I had to at least consider his input since the dobe had been completely my choice. So, we went out to meet breeders of both the breed I wanted (a GSD) and the one he wanted (a weim), and fortunately, he loved the GSD's because they reminded him a bit of our dobe - similar sort of temperament, just with a few differences. Not such a 1 person dog, a property guardian as well as a personal one, more likely to enjoy playing fetch since the breed has been bred to perform a variety of tasks and more fur so that she will be able to keep herself and our dobe warm in winter lol. My partner has bonded very strongly to my dobe, but the dobe is a bit of a one person dog, and so we have decided that as much as we can control, we will try and encourage the new dog to bond to my OH the way the dobe has bonded to me. And I'm not saying the dobe doesn't love him, because I think he does, but it's just little things like, if me and Dan walk in separate directions, he can't even call the dog away from me unless I tell him to go find Dan, and even then, he will run over, then run back, so to separate him from me you basically need a lead. I think that having a dog bonded to him - like being the dogs' 'person' will make a huge difference to how he views their relationship. And in the case of the OP - isn't a dobe a working breed too? I mean sure he also fits into the lap dog category, but if you have a job for him he's overjoyed, and he actually loves anything you ask him to do, like agility, obedience etc. Dobes I think are one of the few breeds that might be really intelligent but are also not independent at all, and so you can ask them to do whatever you want, and they are just desperate to please. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poodlefan Posted May 7, 2011 Share Posted May 7, 2011 I'd recommend you stop thinking about breeds for a while and do two things: 1. Sit down and work on a list of desired characteristics that don't involve appearance. See what you can agree on. 2. Decide what training and lifestyle the dog will lead. 2. Go to a dog show and have a good look around. My guess is there may be breeds that you haven't considered that might be closer to what both of you want. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jacqui835 Posted May 7, 2011 Share Posted May 7, 2011 I'd recommend you stop thinking about breeds for a while and do two things: 1. Sit down and work on a list of desired characteristics that don't involve appearance. See what you can agree on. 2. Decide what training and lifestyle the dog will lead. 2. Go to a dog show and have a good look around. My guess is there may be breeds that you haven't considered that might be closer to what both of you want. That sounds like a great idea actually. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Malamum Posted May 8, 2011 Share Posted May 8, 2011 I'd recommend you stop thinking about breeds for a while and do two things: 1. Sit down and work on a list of desired characteristics that don't involve appearance. See what you can agree on. 2. Decide what training and lifestyle the dog will lead. 2. Go to a dog show and have a good look around. My guess is there may be breeds that you haven't considered that might be closer to what both of you want. I totally agree and was going to say something similar. I'd take breeds and any preconceived ideas of breeds out of the equation for now and just worry about what you both want in a dog and then take it from there. Luckily the OH and I both had similar preferences. We both wanted a large boof-head type breed and his first preference was an Alaskan Malamute which ended up suiting me too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cowanbree Posted May 8, 2011 Share Posted May 8, 2011 In a multiple dog house if the OH expressed an interest in another breed I would be encouraging it as long as he was going to be actively involved in its care and it would fit into the household. After all each breed is very different and they don't suit everyone. I am a working dog person, I love that they want to be with and please me and I can't imagine life with the likes of a sighthound that is quite independent and likely to do what suits them rather than what you ask. Different story if it is a single dog household, then I belive there has to be agreement Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SezzNJunebug Posted May 8, 2011 Share Posted May 8, 2011 I'd recommend you stop thinking about breeds for a while and do two things: 1. Sit down and work on a list of desired characteristics that don't involve appearance. See what you can agree on. 2. Decide what training and lifestyle the dog will lead. 2. Go to a dog show and have a good look around. My guess is there may be breeds that you haven't considered that might be closer to what both of you want. Agreed! OH and I went to our first ever dog show yesterday for a sticky beak and had the best day meeting new doggies and talking with their owners about them. My OH is really quite reserved around new people so it was awesome to see him right into it too! We had so much fun learning about new breeds and their quirks but at the end of the day it was confirmed that we really are smitten with our breed! WOuld be a good opportunity to see how your OH interacts with the breeds as well. I honestly got so much more out of my day at a show than I ever dreamed! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mita Posted May 8, 2011 Share Posted May 8, 2011 (edited) You chose the first dog, so I'd let OH have a big say in the new dog. I'd ask him to make a list of 5 breeds that he'd be keen on...& why. They I'd go thro' the list with him & see if there's one I'd be very happy to live with (& look after!), too. I totally agree with folk who've advised going to dog shows to actually see the breeds & talk to the breeders about what's involved with owning them as pets. If you can't agree after first go, then send him off to make another list of 5. I've got a feeling this could go on forever. But you never know....might hit the jackpot at first. Whatever...best wishes! That's a really good question about bonding. And a hard one! I've had dogs I didn't bond with at first, but within a few months I couldn't imagine life without them. Edited May 8, 2011 by mita Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ruthless Posted May 8, 2011 Share Posted May 8, 2011 OH was really bonded to our Husky and he's told me that one day he wants another one even though I REALLY don't want one. Fact is that I chose Angel, Chopper and Trixie though so I really don't have a leg to stand on :/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Staranais Posted May 8, 2011 Share Posted May 8, 2011 I guess it's like choosing baby names, at the end of the day you need to choose something you can both live with. Having said that, if it's going to be primarily your dog, you should have the last word. Vice versa if it's his dog. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zug Zug Posted May 8, 2011 Share Posted May 8, 2011 Not easy with my husband either. He is not really a dog person (how on earth did I end up married to a non-dog person?!) having never had dogs as pets when he was young etc. He just doesn't really feel drawn to them. So while he is good to our dogs, he doesn't seek out their company. He just does what is required of him and accepts that I will never live without dogs. He is very good to our dogs though. When one of the dogs got sick while I was away earlier this year, he had her straight to the vet, and he took 3 days off work to sit by her side. He's definitely one of the good guys - don't get me wrong. He plays with one of my dogs (the bigger more active one) but while he enjoys it he says that would not be enough to motivate him to be a dog-owner, if it wasn't for me. Which is a lot better than all those people who get dogs because they think they're cute, but then don't do anything with them... So anyway I was (at one point) thinking maybe if I chose a more 'manly' dog he might get more involved. Given I currently have a bichon and a poodle x that is... But when I asked him, he said no it really didn't matter what breed it was. It could be a kelpie or whatever, but he would feel the same way he thinks. He's just not a dog person and that's how it is. So I'm back to thinking about breeds that I love. And given my allergies, I'll stick with poodles etc. because that's what works best for me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
corvus Posted May 8, 2011 Share Posted May 8, 2011 Everyone in our house gets veto rights. For a while OH wanted a Bulldog. I really didn't want one, but to me that's not a reason to not have one. I could live with one. I said if he wanted one that badly we could get one, but he would have to do all the research because I wasn't going to do it for him. He did a little bit of research and decided he wasn't invested enough in the idea to do enough research to make sure he had a high chance of getting a healthy dog. So we got a Vallhund instead. That was a joint decision. If I suggest a breed and he's not into it he says no and that's that. If he suggests a breed I couldn't live with, I say no and that's that. We manage to compromise. He's not as fussy as me. ;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alyosha Posted May 8, 2011 Share Posted May 8, 2011 You can't not bond with a dog you have merely because of its breed or looks if you are a true dog lover. Sorry, but I have to disagree, and actually find that comment a little offensive. When the breed/s that you particularly love have certain basic personality traits, then that is often what you love most about your dogs. If you take on a dog from a different breed that is a completely different animal to live with, you may not bond with it, you may not even like it. If true dog lovers were happy to bond with any and every dog there would be few if any pure breeds because people would not strive to fix certain types and temperaments that are most admirable within a breed. Plus, sometimes certain people and dogs do not bond, just like some people never get along. They should not be made to feel that they are doing sometime wrong, that they are not a "true dog lover". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MsKatie Posted May 8, 2011 Share Posted May 8, 2011 Our Bloodhound was supposed to be my OHs dog - he has loved the breed for a long time - but I researched breeders etc and worked with the breeder we chose to make sure we got a pup that was the best fot for our family - OH loves the big boofer but I end up being the one that walks / feeds / socialises him so that is it - he has had his choice - next dog I choose although I have been told it is not allowed to be a smaller size than our kelpie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leelaa17 Posted May 8, 2011 Share Posted May 8, 2011 I have always wanted a little dog because I had grown up with them. I actually wanted a shih tzu x maltese because I think they are beautiful looking (just my opinion ). OH was always adamant he wanted GSD. He has always loved the breed and thinks they are incredible dogs and he doesn't particularly like little dogs. So we were stuck for a while. The thing that changed was that I realised that I would love any dog that I obtained. I think all dogs are beautiful in their own ways etc and so one day we went online and I was looking up small dogs and OH asked me to check prices of GSD... that day we came home with Max. Next time I am sure we will take more time in getting a dog lol but it worked out well. And now? I couldn't imagine having any other breed. They are so incredibly smart and such beautiful dogs that I have fallen in love. I think labs and GR's are beautiful dogs but I probably wouldn't ever have one, whereas OH would LOVE either/or. Maybe you should look do some research into dogs that you would both like? I think it is sort of like baby names - you WILL eventually come to an agreement, whether that is someone compromising or not ;) Good luck! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leelaa17 Posted May 8, 2011 Share Posted May 8, 2011 I should also note that both dogs are now living with me (OH and I live separately)... even though they were OH's breed of choice! And Max chose me and I chose Jenna. lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WreckitWhippet Posted May 8, 2011 Share Posted May 8, 2011 I just bring home what I want, when I want. Problem solved Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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